Music has a deeper meaning

The very first thing you hear in your life is a heart beat. When you’re laying there in your mothers womb, you can hear her heart beat. Some soon to be parents will put head phones to the mothers stomach and play classics in hopes that it helps their child’s brain development. From such an early age (in some cultures before you’re even born) you’re hearing and feeling a beat. Music isn’t just something we enjoy and listen to it is something that we can’t live without. Even in the most simple sense of the word, it surrounds us and it fills our lives. Disagree with me all you’d like, but I just want to ask a few questions…

First, describe music…  Webster’s dictionary says, “The science or art of ordering tones or sounds in succession, in combination, and in temporal relationships to produce a composition having unity and continuity.” I’d like to challenge this thought though. In life, think of where you hear a recurring beat, or series of different notes that sounds beautiful. More than likely, you woke up to this sound this morning. Birds chirping is such a common occurrence, and that sound can be recalled across the world over more than likely. Birds singing a song just outside your window is one of the sweetest sounding things to wake up to. Their music is sweet and lovely and falls softly on awakening ears. On the other end of that spectrum, your alarm clock makes music, now, I know everyone might agree it’s horrible sounding music, but it is still music. As simple as it may be, one repetitive note hammered continuously until your still asleep body slaps the clock until it falls back to sleep as well. 

So there you have it, almost immediately in your day you’re introduced to song/music/rhythm or whatever you wish to call it. It surrounds you and you can’t escape music.

Why did I bring this up? It’s fairly simple really, and I’d love to explain it here in the following paragraphs. Many people hate or are disgusted with life. They fail to find beauty in the simplest places and they struggle to enjoy what happy moments they have. Now, everyone should have their favorite genre of music. And speaking from a psychological stand point, that genre of music more than likely have a direct correlation to how you live. Take myself for example, I listen to basically all indie/acoustic music. Many people say I’m a down to earth rooted kind of guy. Through the issues I’ve had I find the lyrical content and the emotion expressed through it soothing. I get lost in thought with some songs as they really express the feelings that I had failed to describe earlier in life. My favorite music really influences me in life as I’m “chill” and I just go with what happens generally. (I’m anything but hipster, I’m just going to put that out there. I’m not cool enough to be a hipster.) Now let me tell you about an old high school “friend” all he did with his life was drink monster, and would listen to heavy metal and basically scream-o music. Now, don’t get me wrong, I see absolutely no issues with liking that music and chugging monster (I drink Red Bull a lot), but I’m using them as an example to display how music influences your life. Now when I say they listen to that kind of music, I mean that’s all they listened to, and it showed. They were a fairly aggressive and violent person. Their persona, being a big tough person, came from the music they listened to, they couldn’t let basic things roll off them, they’d just get pissed and want to fight you. 

Some time ago, I was in the car with my parents listening to my phone as a normal teen would do, and my dad made the comment of “You should listen to this, it’ll cure what ails ya” talking about the radio station he was turning up (Smile Fm, a Christian radio station). Now, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with Christian music, but it doesn’t do much for me, just reminds me not of how holy but it reminds me of how hole-y I am. I’m a sinner, I’m a broken person and that music doesn’t help me with my emotions, where as Indie does, it helps me but what I feel into words because I fail with words. What I’m getting at is this though, music will cure what ails you. Whether you listen to emo-punk, goth, indie, rap, country, christian, R&B, or classical, or anything else for the matter, it will help you. You were born to the sound of a beat, a rhythm. You wake up to one as well, and you’re surrounded daily by music. So take some time, listen to music that really touches you. Lay in a field with some headphones in and just get lost in the sound, or get lost in the music nature has supplied. No matter what, music is around you and it is a necessity in life. In history you see music was used as a way to preserve stories for later generations. Now, with so many different instruments, and genres, and musicians, and ways to listen, you should have no problem finding some music that you like. I also think it’s interesting, and would like to see you pay attention to it, how does the music you listen to influence our life? How you act and respond to people. I’d love to know if the music you listen to actually effects you. So try a new genre, you listen to rap all the time? Listen to some classical and see how you feel, see how you begin to think. 

That’s it, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy some music today, whether it is the birds singing, the rhythm your car makes as you go down the free way, or from the radio in your car. Enjoy life “little” things, like music.

Presence Of Purpose

Sorry for the delay, life really sweeps you off your feet and keeps you busy sometimes. Well, here it is though, the latest installment of my thoughts onto a page. I hope you enjoy and find my thoughts riveting and provoking, and I hope they get you thinking about some things yourself.

The presence of purpose is often absent. Many people at a young age are called to what they want to be, and honestly it scares me. There are kids that at the age of 15 know exactly what they want to do with their life's. Now, after my minimal studies of the human brain, the brain isn't fully developed until 25. So kids, 10 years before their brain is developed has made up their ever changing mind on what they want to be... Now, I'm certainly not saying it is impossible, I'm just saying it's unlikely they'll enjoy what they do as much as they thought would. So why is it that we put so much pressure on "children" (in mental development 18 year olds could very well be considered a child). Within in a few years, these adolescents will go from having to ask to use the restroom to deciding what they want to do with their lives. With those types of expectations it's no wonder that many college kids seem to burn out and get swept away in the party scene rather than the education scene.

So, what is the purpose of this post? Well, it's actually to help people understand the purpose of life... Or, honestly, the lack there of. I've struggled constantly with the idea of purpose. "What am I here for?" "What am I good at?" "What will I ever do with my life?" as I'm sure many of you reading have experienced as well. I'm just going to put it out there now, this is absolutely not an answer to possibly the number one issue that people my age face. This, is simply my testimony as to the things I found as I searched for a purpose to my life. Here goes nothing;

I ponder the questions of my mind constantly, and often times my thought process is more just a fix to a problem or an reason for an action rather than a conversation, even with myself. Well, I had the question of purpose get smashed to the front of my brain, and I had no choice but to think about it. What caught me off guard was the fact I had a conversation in my mind rather than my mind just giving me an answer... You know what I realized? I had no clue what I wanted to do with my life. After just coming out of some hard times, I felt like I had so many doors in front of me but every single one was shut and locked. Even now, I constantly stand before doors with a sign hanging on it saying what I could do if I had the key to this door, and in my hand was a key chain chocked full of keys.

The idea that I'm getting at is this, even though I have no clue what I want with my life, I went with my feelings or thoughts at the time. Previously I'd been involved greatly with the financial field so I pursued a career in finance. Now, I'm pursuing a PhD in Psychology. Massive difference, but as my brain developed I understood better what impacted me on a more personal level. When thinking about Econ, all I see are dollar signs. When I think about Psychology I see something greater. I see potential to grow a field through research of ideas that people previously thought inconceivable. What led me to pursue this dream in Psychology was actually my girlfriend. She pointed out to me how much I seemed to enjoy reading Psych books, and how excited I got when given the chance to talk about them. Now, I'm proof that the mind changes, just a couple years ago I'd been this devoted to Econ as I am now to Psych. Well, I wasn't 25 yet. Honestly though, I don't think that number really matters. There's always new things being revealed and you're learning new things.

You see the point I'm getting to? Like I talked about previously, learning massive amounts about a subject that most people wouldn't bat an eyelash at is something that I constantly do. As I learned more about certain things, I found that I enjoyed certain things more than others. Well, I try not to fret about the future too much, I try to enjoy the process of getting to that point. Honestly, I haven't got the slightest clue as to what I really will be doing with my life, but I know that where ever this winding road takes me, I'll be happy. It may seem sometimes I'm going aimlessly about, but trust me, there is a method to my madness, and that madness is actually enjoying the journey more than wondering about the destination. That is what I think is key to life. Life's purpose is to enjoy it. So like those burnt out college students who don't have a clue what they are doing (or where they are when they wake up the morning after big party) enjoy the process of finding where you're headed to. Some of you may be headed to a big office high in a skyscraper, others may be headed to a simple desk job, and others may be headed to a life in the manual labor force building the buildings that business people will work in. No matter what you end up being or doing with life, all of our lives have the same destination, and sadly that's death. Your job? Is going to just be a part of the journey, so why not enjoy the journey, cause in reality we all know where we are headed.

Enjoy life, do what you love to do and I promise you will not be disappointed with the way things turn out. I'm reminded of a funny movie that I love to go back and watch, "Accepted". It's about Bartleby who creates a college after getting denied from every college he applied to. He has no clue what he wants to be, but through the journey he figures out his place. He's a pioneer of a university and a new way of learning. There are some parts of the movie that are off but over all it's a funny and good movie to see.

So there, sorry for babbling on, I hope this all made sense. So, if you're like me and unsure what you really will be doing or achieving in your life, I pray you find a way to enjoy the journey.

Taken With Novelty

"'Is this it for you? Is this all you'll ever do?'
Her smile, collapsed, that tightly strapped-in pasty skin went loose. Her heart fell crooked.
She said (not knowing my real name) 'I can tell buddy, by the mini thins and the way you drive... We're booth taken with novelty. We've believed in mean gods. We both spend our money on things that break too easily like... people."

This little blurb here is from a spoken word poem that I've really fell in love with. It's "Convenience Stores" by Buddy Wakefield. Well, this part of the poem got me thinking... Novelty. What is novelty in the first place? Well, according to most dictionaries it'd be described as "the quality of being new, original, or unusual." I wonder though, why does novelty have to be new? Why can't we constantly be taken by novelty, why can't we all see the world like it is amazing every day?

Looking at the world as if it were new and unique, what would that do to us? In all honesty, I think it'd be beneficial for people to start looking at the world in a different light. It's true, the more you know the worse it is. Often that quote is said about military movies, but I think that can be used in all aspects of life. Now, I'm guessing only some of you live in mid Michigan, but take for example the current weather.... SNOW! Now, I love snow... But I also love summer... So, I'm laying here, thinking about how beautiful it is, but say I was a child or from like desert areas, where I'd never seen snow before. How would I react to this white powder falling from the sky? Honestly, I'm not sure, but I bet I'd just be going nuts. I mean, really, if you'd never seen something how would you respond? Think about it for a minute...

Kids, they are astounded by the simplest of things, when they are young they keep asking "why", they want to know and they want to learn. That is the kind of mind I want to have. I want to constantly expand my thinking by seeing things in a new light. Even the simplest things like snow.

Now, as much as I agree with that thinking of the more you know the less you enjoy it... But come to think of it, I honestly think that in someways knowing more will actually be great. To me, knowledge is powerful and in some ways knowing more about something can make it better! Call me crazy, I know, but sometimes, having a vast knowledge of something can allow you to share that with people who don't know as much. Just the other day, I was over taken with joy when I found out that due to the fact that platypuses are a solitary animal, there is no true collective noun for them, but "paddle" is what would be used if you ever saw a group of platypuses! Like, really, isn't that amazing! Not only that, they're a mammal that lays an egg! Insanity! Sorry, I'll calm down...

Do you get what I'm talking about though? So here's a challenge from you, take things in life not as a grain of salt but as a mountain of knowledge that you can obtain! Do some research, you can always find some interesting things on Google about topics that you come across. So today, I challenge you to take something that would often be considered minuscule and do research. Start today, learn something you never knew about an average topic. Learn to see things that cause you to be taken with novelty, enjoy life, and the things you can learn from simple little topics. Enjoy the little things!!!! Be overtaken with great novelty! I think you'll enjoy it!

Gifted With Support

Hello all! I'm so sorry for not posting anything in a rather long time... I've been caught up at work and school and yeah... Really haven't had much time to write. But, the long wait is over, here is another post for your visual consumption!

As of late I've been feeling challenged, I've been feeling pushed towards a degree and career in a field I'd always been intrigued by but never thought much about. I've had my focus turned towards the brilliant degree that is psychology. Previously, if you follow me on instagram, you'd have noticed that my lovely girlfriend got me a great book for christmas. Well, she followed that up on valentines with another very good book. Both of these books delve deep into psychology subjects, and as she said, I devoured them. Well, I've found myself diving head first into psychology and truly loving it. Now, onto the subject of this post...

All through school you hear from fellow classmates and teachers about your abilities. You either hear, "Wow Billy, very smart of you, wonderful job!" and you receive high praise and high expectations, or, you hear your teachers say, "Good job Billy" and hand back a paper with a decent grade on it. Or, if you're like me, you often hear from teachers, "I don't think you understand the subject matter, you need to try harder." Often times followed by low expectations on your projects or homework. Well, for the longest time I'd grown up thinking I wasn't smart enough and wasn't going to amount to much because I never seemed to understand the subject matter.

So here I am, 19 going on 20, feeling like I'm not really smart enough or able enough to complete higher education. My girlfriend however has implemented in me a thought of having the ability, a thought of being smart enough. Lately, after receiving booth these amazing books and practically devouring them and learning from them, my girl listens to me go on and on about them. She then informs me of how smart I am. She convinced me to take an IQ test, if you can believe the scores that are earned have any relation to a persons intelligence, and well, to her amusement I scored fairly high on them. Now that I am in college, the one psych class I've taken, the professor would respond to my papers with high praise, and I felt good and felt as thought they expected that so I fulfilled that in the ensuing papers.

I'm not telling you all of this to toot my own horn, or to make myself sound like some kind of brainiac nerd because I identify as the furthest thing from. Yes, I've grown a knack for reading and I have a book list that would make most heads turn, but you can thank my girl for that. I tell you this in hopes that some parents, teachers, and even students will read this and learn something. My hope is that they'd learn to be a generous support system for young students. I'm not talking about a personal support where you help through life, as much as that is needed, educational support is needed more. Students struggle for a few reasons, focus is lost, motivation is killed. Students, especially younger children thrive off of what teachers and parents think and show. We subliminally communicate expectations that other unconscious minds pick up on, and kids minds can easily pick up on the supposedly unbiasedness of teachers. Students who constantly fail will see in the teacher a low expectation, they'll be ridiculed by their smarter classmates and they'll begin to think they'll end up flipping burgers. That was me.

Studies have proven the fact, that the "naturally" born gifted children weren't born that way, they were nurtured that way. Parents often times have expectations for their children, and the kids can read that on an unconscious level and they more than often achieve the expectations. They give 50 kids an IQ test, and handed the results to the teacher and marked 25 of the children as "extremely gifted" one year later, the same scientists give the same test to the same kids, on average, the kids gained about 5 points on the test. But those 25 that were labeled and viewed as gifted received higher expectations from the teachers and parents, their test scores improved on average by 20 points and at most 40 points. You can't tell me that supporting and having expectations for your kids doesn't help.

I'm not by any means saying that by simply having expectations for your children or students they'll achieve them, because there are always exceptions to the rule. But, if you consciously make an effort to support your children and have high expectations, your unconscious mind will send messages to theirs, and they'll be more likely to succeed in reaching your expectations. So there we go, some food for thought, and if you don't believe me you should, because I went from a kid who was close to flunking out of high school, to someone who is actively thinking about working to achieve a PhD in psychology. I went from reading a book in a year to reading 2 books in the past month by simply receiving support and receiving high praise along with high expectations from people I care about most.

Thank you for reading, hope you enjoy. I'll try not to have as long a wait before my next post!

Listen closely, it is more than sound.

Sorry for the delay, and sorry for the odd Monday post... I have kind of been lost in school work and bowling. Life just keeps going, and I guess it's my job to try to keep up. Well here's my latest thoughts... Music!

So, I’m relaxing and listening to some music the other day, and come across two songs that I absolutely fall for. So, this post will be talking about both songs… They are both of done by Passenger, and quite honestly may be a few of the most honest and well worded songs I’ve ever really heard. 

In the song “Holes”, he speaks about how people struggle through life and lose things. The same time though, in losing everything, they find something greater than the all the things they lost. They find the idea of strength and courage to be an underdog. “Yeah we got holes, in our hearts, yeah we got holes, in our lives, yeah we got holes, we got holes. But we carry on.” If you’ve never heard this song, I suggest you listen to it. There’s a little language, but overall it’s an amazing song with a great moral. Another line from it that resonates with me, “Let me tell you something, when you’ve got nothing, you’ve got nothing to lose.” The verses talk of two people he’s met, both in horrible situations, but both say what the chorus says, “Yeah we got holes… But we carry on.” This song doesn’t speak, but screams the idea that guess what, no matter how down you get… Life carries on! Isn’t that a wonderful statement? I mean, life is horrible, you may feel down and out. You may be left with holes in your hearts but the truth is everyone around you has holes. A hole from a previous relationship, a hole from parent issues. Anything and everything can cause holes. Look around you, breath, see the people walking around… You’re not alone. I have my fair share of holes. But life carries on. And that is the beauty in life, the fact we as humans carry a similar characteristic, more so than just being, well… Human.

The second song is “Little Lights”. This, to me, can be such a sad and depressing song but at the same time it conveys such a warm feeling. The idea is that we are all born with little lights, which is love, that show us the way to go in our lives. “We’re born with millions, of little lights shinning in the dark, and they show us the way. One lights up, every time we feel love in our hearts, and it dies when it goes away.” It’s such a beautiful song, talking how he’s gone trough life with all these little lights and every time that love dies in him a light goes out. You know, after listening to this song several times over the past few days, I can’t help but fall more in love with this concept. I mean, be honest with yourself, cause I’m going to be honest now… Majority of people have a conscious, a little voice in their head telling them what’s right and wrong. Unfortunately this voice fades the more and more we lie or do wrong, and it’s also silenced from the get go in some people. We all live the same life. Think, we are all born, we are all subject to events that could happen to anyone, and we all live and die. We are all filled with little hearts, unfortunately life happens and these little lights are blown out in a split second when born into broken homes and deep poverty. It’s sad to think about, but it is possible to gain lights, show love and give love. It’s as simple as that. After a dear friend of mine had committed suicide, I had saw this quote that I really like… “Be kinder than necessary, everyone is fighting a battle of some sorts.” What a beautiful thought. To be able to influence someones life for the better by simply being kind and loving. Not to mention it will certainly make you feel better too. I’ve been working on this since that horrible day I received that phone call… Another thing I read was a great story by this one girl. She was out with her boyfriend and he’d wave and smile to everyone they met. She asked him why he does that, he doesn’t know them. His response, “I heard from a few people who had failed in there attempts of suicide, they said if even a stranger had acknowledged them they may not have tried”. Umm… wow. Like, what kind of life do you really want to live, cause I know I want to live a outwardly life that effects the world for the better. Even though I may not receive much in return, the emotional gratification that I helped out is more than enough.

I guess with this post I’m just letting you know, that songs are powerful. Emotions are powerful. Everything happens for a reason and you can always change your thinking on what is happening. Listen to some music, really think about what the author/artist is trying to get across. Critical thinking is a great tool to have in all of life. Just saying…

Ignorance is Blissful for the Ignorant

It’s no secret what technology has allowed, it has opened the flood gates of the people who do not know or understand a topic to post their thoughts and opinions on that matter. At one time, I do believe ignorance is bliss and I believe that it was taught and instilled by parents that if you don’t know or understand something, listen. But in modern day, the progression of getting your voice out there and the ability to hide behind a screen has allowed people who may not be ignorant about something, but simply uninformed to voice their opinions. I’m not saying it’s wrong to let your thoughts on a subject be known, by all means, let the world know what you think, but before you post, think. Think about what you’re saying, think if it even makes sense and especially if it is even right. It’s simple and can save you a lot of embarrassment if someone who actually knows what is going on responds to your post. You’ll be at a loss for words as that persons comments cut yours to the ground. The difference between an uniformed post and a thoughtful informed one is that the later has a leg to stand on. When you use facts instead of just feelings and ideas, you have a stronger hold on the conversation (unfortunately this doesn’t mean you’ll “win” the argument).

I’m not saying this to be mean or to demean anyone. That is not my intentions at all. I simply want to help people understand the importance of understanding a subject before they make a post and make a fool of themselves. Not to classify anyone, but I see this kind of ignorant attitude in todays youth. As a senior who had studied many reports on subjects and built my opinion based off of that, I often found myself being attacked verbally by an eighth grader who had read the title of the article. It was embarrassing, mainly because their tactics didn’t allow me to get in a word. I promise, I’m not writing this to belittle anyone, I’m simply attempting to tell you that it is very important to be informed on a subject before you enter in a conversation/argument about it. 

You know, I’m just going to say it… It frightens me. It frightens me seeing how many people think they know what they are talking about as they post comments on Facebook and Twitter about things. All they seem to do is read the title and create a complex theory based off of that. There are a few parts of that that disturb me, 1) don’t believe everything you read on the internet and 2) 99% of articles seem to be written from a certain view point. You can’t take those for fact when they are written with an opinion. Everyone has opinions, and sadly to completely understand a topic (speaking a political issue or financial issues) you have to read and take in as many articles as possible based off it. Half the time I wonder if these people that comment or respond to my comments in public even read the article or just read the title. The reason this disturbs me though is because that an uninformed, naive, and ignorant society surely can’t survive. “See no (insert issue), speak no (insert issue), hear no (insert issue)” doesn’t make the problem go away! Ignorance is defined as lack of knowledge or information. Naivety is defined as lack of experience, wisdom, and judgment. The issues isn’t the lack of information though, I believe the issues is that so many people to realize that knowledge and understanding, and the reading or listening that has to be done to understand something. When you close your mind, you allow issues that are very real to slip by. Then, it comes and slaps you in the face and you wonder what the heck happened… (Education for me, just squeaked by doing minimal work all though middle and high school, but now I realize the demanding work that is required to do well in College.) 

I love the quote by the one and only Ricky Gervais, “Ignorance is bliss… For the ignorant. For the rest of us it’s a pain in the butt.” (Now, I did make it G rated as Ricky has a mouth, but you get the idea). Being ignorant may be blissful for a time, but understand that people lose respect for you for several reasons. One, because no body likes a know it all, especially when they do not know it all. Two, if you talk like you know it, but what you say shows otherwise, then all that does is make them not enjoy talking to you, if you respond with a close minded “this is the way” answer, they will not want to talk to you. Three, they don’t feel like they can talk to you. When people respond with closed mindedness, my initial response is honestly, “why am I talking still”. Ignorance makes conversation extremely difficult. 

I’m sure you’ve all heard about the whole deal in Texas right now, where a young boy who is muslim showed up to school with a clock he made to show his teachers. 1) It wasn’t show and tell day… 2) It wasn’t actually a clock (it was a clock his father brought home from the Radio Shack he works at and the boy made it so it counted down) 3) The boy took it to school in a briefcase and used wires rather than locks to hold it shut… And so many people read the title, “Muslim boy arrested for bringing clock he made to school.” The teachers weren’t being racist, they were doing their job of protecting other students. They didn’t accuse him of anything, the first teacher asked him to keep it in his locker and not take it out until he headed home, so what’d he do? Took it into the next teacher who said the same thing. So, I’m not saying you’re one of those people, but before posting on something, get the facts first. Yes it’s good and American to have an opinion, but quite honestly, you shouldn’t have an opinion until you’ve read or heard and understand the real facts. Most people think that the news hides facts, and yes I am sure they do, but there’s more news agencies than just CNN News or Fox. Listen to a few talk shows like Glenn Beck and you’ll get news with facts so that your opinion can have a leg to stand on.

I suppose that this post has been a very long and winded way of saying, “Open your eyes, ears, heart, and mind!” (Imagine I’m yelling, unless you don’t like that, then imagine I’m speaking as softly as a butterfly). Society will surely die (not that dramatic but will surely struggle) as ignorance doesn’t allow progression. Listen and learn, obtain knowledge, and live a wonderful life full of interesting thoughts and ideas. Whether you want to accept it or not, the issues of life are there and very real, and they will come up to get you whether you acknowledge their existence or not. Oddly enough, one of the biggest issues I see, is ignorance, and this needs to be fixed. No more 12 year olds acting like they know everything and responding harshly to someone who has actually looked into and studied that subject. It’s hurtful, and it’s going to lead to issues as the people who know something aren’t going to be allowed to talk. So yeah, please, I beg of you, read, take in, and listen. Especially if you are not totally sure on stuff, even then, listen to what they have to say. Sure you win arguments when you don’t let them talk, but you lose companions or friends at the same time. So listen, who knows, they may have an idea you hadn’t thought about. I’m sorry if this is accusatory, I don’t mean it to be, I’m trying to shed light on the fact that ignorance can and will drive society into the ground. So I’m asking you, and I’m doing it too, to look into a story, get the facts, find the reality before creating and basing an opinion on the title of the article. Thanks for reading.

Happy is a yuppie word...

I am convinced, that happy is truly a yuppie word. Now, before you look at me like I’m crazy and I’m trying to be Dr. Seuss, understand this… Yuppie is a word, and it’s a pretty great adjective describing a person (for the fact that it sounds). Yuppie is defined as a well-paid young upper middle-class individual working in the city and living a luxurious lifestyle. So, now that you understand what “yuppie” means, I can begin to make my statement and describe to you why I truly believe that happy is a yuppie word. Although, maybe I will restate that, “happy is a word for the yuppie” makes a little more sense maybe… or not. At least it makes sense to me! And hopefully as I describe this, it might make sense to you too! Or… maybe not. Oh well.

When you think of happy, what’s the first thought that comes to mind? Usually, good memories, times spent with family, or your significant other or what not. That would be the typical answer when asked about happiness, for obvious reasons. Now think about joyous times? That’s a tad bit harder. There is barely a handful of times in my life that I can recall that I felt joy. Joy is an after thought, when you suffer with depression. Oddly enough, when you’re in a hole in life and suffering in the deep darkness of depression… all you want to feel is love and happiness. But honestly, looking back, the root was happiness. Or so I thought. Because I wanted to be happy with friends and family who cared. I wanted my old heart that was wrapped in a cast to be signed by those who cared. I sat their daily, begging for signatures as if I was holding a petition for something unruly, and all I seemed to get were noses stuck up at me. Happiness escaped me, along with joy and love, and all the emotions I once held dear. Being bullied and teased through middle and high school stunk. I’ve grown to believe that happiness isn’t an emotion it is simply a decision on what happened. We created this “emotion” per-say when in reality, happiness is more than likely thought based. A thought that we create about things. 

The creation of an emotion in a mind is easy except you don’t realize that the so called “emotion” is actually a creation. You see, so many people (like myself) have for so long created the perception of happiness that we just believe it to be real. But what if I told you that you can create a happy situation out of nearly everything? Seems crazy, yes, even I’ll admit that… I’m serious though. I honestly believe without a doubt that happiness is not a real emotion but a mental decision. When something happens, if you’re not really sure what you’re feeling, what is your response? I find typically, when something good happens but I’m not sure how I feel, I simply tell myself I feel happy. There’s not much else too it? Oddly enough, I think that because we say “I feel happy” makes it a conscious decision. When you have to make a conscious decision that you’re going to feel happy, that voids it from being an emotion. I’m not talking about when you are asked how you feel, I’m talking about when you sit there and question how you feel.

So, the other day I was talking to a friend (yes, I do have a friend outside my girlfriend) and they were talking about how things were going wrong. Now, I know that feeling, I have had my fair share of issues, but over time I’ve come to the realization that life is simply filled with choices. Now, I know that I’ve talked about this before but I guess I’m just talking about this more and more because I realize how important it is in life to understand this. Every scenario in life presents a decision, you can either take things with a grain of salt and understand that life is a journey and a lesson, or take it harshly and be bitter. Life if about choices, and I’ve begun to think and realize that happiness and sadness aren't so much feelings and emotions as they are about a decision. A very common thing I hear, and yes I’m guilty of this, is saying that “I hate my job” or “I hate… about my job”. I am highly guilty of this as I work a third shift job and it’s torture sometimes not getting much sleep. Well, I’ve come to realize how lucky I am to have a job. Sure I may not be making much, and I’m working odd hours and I find grapes in the diaper aisle or whole potatoes in the freezers and I become frustrated with people, I soon relax and realize how lucky I am to have a job. I somehow convince myself I’m happy to serve and take care of items people leave in the wrong aisles because maybe they can’t afford it anymore. It’s unfortunate they leave it there, but hey, gives me something to do and humors me sometimes (I found a large watermelon on the top shelf of the chips… like, how??) Anyways, life is based off of decisions that we have in life, we always make decisions, and so often times we as humans make the easy decision about our feelings on something. If it’s good, we are happy! If it’s bad, we are sad. Yes, simplistic, but lets try this, to make life a little more enjoyable, and I’m working on this too, when life hits a bumpy patch, somehow find happiness. Find a reason to be happy. 

You know… I have come to the conclusion as well that there are rainbows everywhere. Whether or not a storm came through, there’s a rainbow. The thing is, rainbows are simply water particles being reflected, so who’s to say that we are just not at the right angle to see a rainbow? I truly think there are rainbows everywhere, and if you fail to see one, try changing your perspective.

I’m putting this out there as a helpful tool for everyone. If you don’t agree that happiness is a conscious choice, great, believe what you believe. But, I do think it’s about a decision more so than a feeling. I believe it, and I’m working to change the way I perceive life. If I’m to be quite honest, my life has taken a drastic turn to the positive since I’ve been seeing things through rose tinted glasses. Yes, I still feel like a lot of times life is bad, but, the good times are a lot better now. So, thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed.